Wiesz, że świat jest pełen chłopaczków z poziomem rozwoju dziecka z piaskownicy bawiących się dżdżownicą, którzy są bardziej zagubieni niż GPS w górach. Wiesz, zero planów, zero odpowiedzialności za swoje słowa, intelektualnie poziom wczesnej meduzy. Brak zasad, brak priorytetów, brak samodzielności. Ogólnie bardziej brak czegokolwiek, jakiegokolwiek punktu zaczepienia, ponieważ poziom męskości i dojrzałości, cały proces został zatrzymany w zarodku. Taki proces uboczny, odpad nadopiekuńczości. Na pewno to znasz, na pewno takich spotykasz i na pewno, na pewno na takich narzekasz w czasie babskich wieczorów, imprez do białego rana, obiadów w pracy, plotkach przy kawie… Że współczesny facet to brak charakteru i poszukiwacz zagubionych jaj. Problem polega na tym, że to wszystko to proces. Charakter kształtują doświadczenia, inteligencja musi mieć szansę się rozwijać, mięśnie same się nie zrobią, pieniądze same nie wpadną do portfela, a bez cienia własnej przestrzeni każdy z czasem spizdowacieje. To prawda. Subiektywna. Własna, wymęczona, wymyślona, potwierdzona i opatentowana przez siebie samego.
Bo spójrz, chcesz mieć kogoś, kto wie, czego chce, kto z jednej strony Cię pożąda jak jaskiniowiec, jakbyś była boginią, a z drugiej strony chcesz opiekuńczości i czasu tylko we dwoje… Jeśli tego chcesz, to musisz nauczyć się kompromisów. Nikt nie lubi klatek, nikt, zapisz i zapamiętaj. Nikt kurwa.
To, co pociągające w drugiej osobie to właśnie to, co kształtuje go w wolnym czasie. Pasje, przeczytane książki, osiągnięte cele, zasady wykute w bólu i pocie, to tworzy ten zestaw i to również wymaga czasu, bo wybacz, ale ideały to rodzą się w bajkach Disney’a i zazwyczaj tak trafiają na drugi ideał, zamknięty w wysokiej wieży, z twarzą nieskalaną żadną głębszą myślą. Takie są bajki, pokazują cukierkowe relacje, bez rozpatrywania osobowości i to jest słodkie kiedy masz 5 lat, jak masz 25 lat i dalej chcesz być księżniczką, to wybacz, ale coś w Twoich zwojach mózgowych poszło nie tak, umysł zaliczył error.
Podsumowując, naucz się patrzeć na drugą osobę jak na kogoś, kto Cię kocha, kocha mocno, jednak w tej miłości 24h każdy powinien mieć czas dla siebie, czas na swój rozwój, bo to właśnie osobowość i charakter przyciągają, ale muszę mieć czas na to, by gdzieś rozkwitnąć.
Rozumiesz dziewczyno? Chłopaku dotarło? To osobowość wpływa na to, że ludzie łączą się w pary i dają radę, że budzą w sobie zachwyt, że uczą się od siebie bycia lepszymi każdego dnia w imię miłości, która jest zdrowa i wyrozumiała, bo pozwala na czas własny, bo daje możliwość zatęsknienia za sobą. Miłość to składowa wielu małych elementów i dwojga ludzi, którzy są dla siebie niekończąca się motywacją, którzy siebie chcą, a nie potrzebują, którzy wierzą, że dbając o swój rozwój i harmonię życia z samym sobą, wnoszą do swojej relacji coś cennego… Coś, co wzbogaca jako parę.
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Dziękuję za ten tekst…
Zgadzam się…trzeba też mieć czas dla siebie. Co by się sobą za szybko nie znudzić….;-)
Właśnie tak 😉
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