Jeśli jesteś facetem, a zakładam, że jesteś, bo coś tam Ci dynda między nogami i determinuje Twoją płeć, to uwierz mi po raz kolejny. To jak będzie wyglądała Twoja relacja, to jak będą Cię postrzegać kobiety, zależy od tego, jak Ty się postrzegasz i jak wyraźne granice jesteś w stanie postawić. Kobiety czasem nieświadomie stosują pełnego rodzaju mini teściki na bazie, których oceniają Twoją osobowość i charakter. Tak, jesteśmy sprawdzani i testowani na miliony sposobów. I tutaj w zależności od tego, jakim arsenałem zarządzą Twoja kobieta, masz większe lub mniejsze środki zapobiegające oderwaniu najważniejszych kończyn. Tracą kutasa, tracisz pewność siebie, szacunek do siebie, a kobieta, jeżeli nie masz jasnych granic, poczucia pewności, może próbować kastrować Cię emocjonalnie. Uwierz mi kastracja emocjonalna, jest tak samo bolesna… Kurwa, nawet nie chcę sobie tego wyobrażać, bo się kurczę… Kobiety lubią karać ciszą, kiedy coś idzie nie po ich myśli lub kiedyś zrobisz coś nie tak. Oczywiście „nie tak” w ich mniemaniu. To forma manipulacji, rozumiem oburzenie kochane, ale to jest forma manipulacji i to nie ulega wątpliwości. Jak słyszę, że ktoś za nieposłuszeństwo dostał szlaban na seks, to mnie chuj strzela w przenośni i dosłownie…, ale o tym kiedyś…
Zatem dostajesz po twarzy wymowną ciszą… Ok, raz na jakiś czas, zdarza się, może czasem nam się należy, poza tym powiedzmy sobie szczerze, taka cisza wpływa rozwijająco na związek. Czasami. No dobra, może nawet nie rozwija, ale jest spokój przez jakiś czas. Brutalne, ale tak bywa. Jednak, jeżeli jesteś policzkowany cisza kilka razy w tygodniu za byle głupstwo, to pora zaznaczyć granicę. Z jednej strony kobiety lubią facetów, których mogą sobie podporządkować, a z drugiej, po jakimś, czasie marzą o kimś, kto potrafi im się przeciwstawić i pokazać swoje zdanie. Wychowują pantoflarzy, by potem marzyć o stanowczym i męskich samcach. Paradoks. Wiem.
Wracając do granic. Dla kobiety możesz być paproszkiem, którego przesuwa jednym dmuchnięciem, albo skałą, na której się wesprze, ale nie będzie w stanie jej przesunąć. To kwestia granic. Kluczem do tego jest wyznaczenie, jak chcesz być traktowany i to czy pozwolisz sobie wejść na głowę, czy też nie. To, co sobie cenię w relacjach to to, że owszem mogę pozwolić komuś na wiele, ale jeżeli ktoś podejmuje próby naginania moich granic, to zaczynam warczeć i gryźć. Mam jasno określone warunki co do tego, na co się godzę, a na co nie. Jeżeli jako facet, w relacji z kobietą, nie zadbasz o szacunek do samego siebie, to nikt tego za Ciebie nie zrobi.
Kobiety wymagają szacunku, ale warto zaznaczyć, że my też go oczekujemy. Warto o tym mówić bardzo głośno. Kiedy pozwalasz na to, żeby kobieta Tobą rządziła, to z czasem przestanie się Tobą interesować, bo nie będziesz dla niej wartościowym partnerem. Jeżeli pozwolisz złapać się za jaja, potem te jaja dasz sobie urwać i wrzucić do maszynki do mięsa, a na końcu jeszcze dostaniesz je na obiad, który zjesz ze smakiem, to sorry, ale sam to sobie zrobiłeś. I oczywiście, wielokrotnie możesz słyszeć, że jesteś chujem. Możesz też słyszeć, że nie potrafisz się dostosować do niej, ale związek nie polega do dopasowywaniu się do siebie, tylko na szanowaniu siebie nawzajem. I uwierz mi, nie tracąc siebie, nie stracisz kobiety, z którą chcesz być. Tak po prostu. Tak to działa. No, chyba że się mylę…
33 comments
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